Mommy Blogging

Heather Armstrong Strongarms GOMI

Before anyone asks where the Post Of A Million Outrages went, it has been removed. As she promised, Dooce has had a lawyer send a letter to me and my hosting company threatening litigation over the rumors of her filming a YouTube show in LA.

I was made to feel threatened by the next to last paragraph, which in my opinion implied that I could just make this all go away if I would reveal my source:

Since I refuse to do this without the permission of my tipster or a court order, I have removed the disputed post. The communication stated I am also “liable for all damages and injury flowing from such a publication”; I’m going to assume this means anything from hurt feelings to falling pageviews.

I have now stated multiple times that reporting on Dooce has no malicious intent. My opinions are just that – my opinions. As far as some pattern of attack or whatever, that’s ridiculous; Dooce is a celebrity, and my previous posts about her are commentary and reporting on information publicly posted by her and her husband and are reported as news, not a planned attack. Since roughly 9 posts out of over 1,400 on GOMI are about Dooce, I’m not sure how that constitutes some malicious repeated long term attempt to disparage her, but that’s neither here nor there. I’m not revealing my source. They are free to come forward themselves and ask me for her lawyers information if they choose to show they exist. The rest of you are free to assume whatever you want in regards to their existence.

For the record this whole thing could have been avoided by a simple email to me saying my sources were incorrect and could I please remove the post, and I would have, and quickly put up a post with her denial and a statement that I only posted what my source sent me and they could have been wrong. I would have even apologised. Instead she chose to go this very aggressive, public route.

Anyway, that’s that. The post is no longer public, Heather’s lawyer says she wasn’t doing anything with YouTube so presumably my source was incorrect, and as far I’m concerned this is over. Can we please all move on now and get back to making fun of Brit’s yoga mats and speculating on the state of Messicas uterus?

  1. avatar Lolabird

    I do not understand this. At all.
    Why wouldn’t she do exactly what you had suggested? (email, and say, no, that didn’t happen)
    This just makes her look like a douche.

    • avatar JFA

      Please. She WANTED to get a lawyer and scare PP. She has enough money to do that now. i’m sorta glad as it proves what a gigantic piece of shit she really is.

      She has to live with herself, and that is the worst punishment of all.

      • avatar Whole Foods granola and conch shell and beetle husk

        True that. Much as I snark about Kerf, at least I don’t have to worry that Glad O’ Baby is going to be born into a home of mental illness any more severe or damaging than being deprived of the savory joy of onions.

      • avatar Rowena T.

        Yep. Oh, the irony of this whole situation. As I said (at length) in the now sadly hidden post, Dooce made this story far bigger than it ever was to begin with. Most of us here, I’d say, are lukewarm toward Dooce, or, while aware she’s a raging narcissist and a hateful bully, mostly ignore her. I certainly didn’t care what the hell she did on her break.

        But now–now that she incited an Invasion of the Assholes and succeeded in strong arming PP–well, now we’re entrenched. We now have the ultimate confirmation that she’s a terrible human being.

        Goddammit. The reason I was invested enough to write several mini-dissertations in the other thread is that I didn’t want Heather to win this one, that I didn’t think she deserved yet another occasion to stroke her own ego by successfully shutting down criticism. And I really wanted to explain what we do here to those half-wit trolls, who seemed to have a fundamental misunderstanding of how the world works, how the internet works, and how criticism works.

        I know Partypants is done with the whole thing, and I totally understand, but I can’t help but wish that at least the comments on that post could have been preserved. GOMIers were so funny, so smart, so skilled at pointing out all the trolls’ and Dooce’s hypocrisy and logical fallacies. Oh well–the Britney gifs and the inability of the Doocesters to say anything cogent or grammatically correct will live on in my heart.

    • avatar Who do you think you are?

      I’ve been mild Dooce fan for ages but this post right here sent me over the edge. I just removed her from my Google reader. Heather, you suck.

    • avatar Gina

      …or GOMI could have emailed Heather to verify her tipster’s information. Just sayin’. Ace reporting this was not.

      • avatar New Year New You

        Yes Brainiac, if someone is keeping a secret, if you just email them and ask them to tell the truth they do. All criminals are caught this way too.


        • avatar Gina

          Yes, you do. And if they don’t respond, you say “I emailed Dooce, who has chosen not to comment.” And if she says something else happened, you say, “Dooce has denied this claim.”

          o_0 at you likening this to a criminal investigation. Bloggers and reporters do exactly this, every day.

    • avatar Double Douchey

      I cant stand her Hit her where it hurts. Don’t click on any links on her page. Don’t buy her books a d if you did leave a negative review. Complain to ikea and anyone else who does business with her. F her douchey bitch

  2. avatar pbpickledginger

    This is absolutely the most childish thing I’ve ever seen on the part of Ms. Armstrong. I am so embarrassed for her.

    Heather, if you are reading this, and I know you are, you are really pathetic. I used to be a huge fan, but I stopped reading two years ago, and I will never go back. I won’t give pageviews to an obviously deeply unhinged bully.

    • avatar featherbrained

      It’s really disgusting. Dooce is not even among the most ragged on of Gomi subjects and PP used the word “alleged”…so what’s the legal argument here? I don’t see one AT ALL.

    • avatar Brain Child

      I truly believe she takes joy in it – she felt intimidated back whenever she was sued-said something about legal system only benefits the large corporations, not individuals. She’s now a corporation and has the money to bully whomever she chooses. Bravo Heather – you’re climbing higher into your isolated tower.

    • avatar raisesun

      Bully and hypocrite.

      • avatar DoingItRight

        She truly disgusts me. I can’t believe how long it took me to see this. Sorry, Alice. Hope you don’t lose too much sleep over this.

      • avatar Double Douchey

        Hit her where it hurts. Don’t click on any links on her page. Don’t buy her books a d if you did leave a negative review. Complain to ikea and anyone else who does business with her. F her douchey bitch

  3. avatar onlyconnect

    Since your sources were actually wrong, and your post was untrue, maybe you should actually also say “I’m sorry for writing something hurtful that wasn’t true” instead of posturing as the injured party because a lawyer is calling you out for your lie.

    • avatar self help

      Did you know that you could go suck it? Yeah, I thought so.

    • avatar Ghost of Mary Todd

      Seriously, Dooce isn’t going to invite you over for Paleo cakes.

      Fuck off.

    • avatar rhonered

      @onlyconnect- Hi Dooce! Why not just post under your real name?

    • avatar Pelt-a-polozza

      Right @OnlyConnect – heather wasn’t in LA filming a YouTube show – she was at Coachella at a music fest – says two difference sources, ALLEGEDLY.

      Dooce’s splitting of hairs shows how mental she is.

      PS used to be a huge fan – not any more.

      • avatar Duchess of Fatwick

        Pelt, It was for Hulu. And I’ll sue your pelt off it you say otherwise.

    • avatar Nope

      You posted your opinion. You had your shot and you failed to changed the stone cold hearts of us meanies who exist solely to target the poor, helpless people who post their personal lives on the internet for money. Now leave.

      • avatar Really?

        Apparently I am now banned here and can no longer respond to your comments. When I try to do so from my computer I am told I am posting too quickly, though I have posted far less than many of you and not at all in the last several hours. And my last comment, which was nothing spectacular and contained nothing offensive or untrue, was deleted.

        So in the future, you can no longer say you don’t delete critical comments here like some bloggers do. Also you continue to criticize me but I am unable to respond. So I guess I am done here.


        • avatar Coach Clodhoppers

          You’re not banned, dumbass, that’s the server trying to keep up with replies and views. Try again in a couple minutes and your post will go right through; this has happened to me and I’m not a “banned Dooce supporter.” I waited 2 minutes, posted it, and it worked just fine. Dear God, you are not that intimidating and important that PP would ban you.

          • avatar onlyconnect

            If this comment posts, then you’re right, and I apologize for my accusation.

          • avatar Coach Clodhoppers

            Hey, don’t apologize to me! Apologize to PP for libeling her by saying she bans people. That’s libel, you know. Srs bsnss.

          • avatar Temporary in*sanity

            @Party Pants – is that why I’m unable to “like” any comments that already have any votes now … do the gerbils that are powering the server (see how technical I am?!) think I’ve already voted if there is even one “like” vote already recorded?

            BTW, more props for the grace with which you’re navigating this mess. I know you have an actual life away from GOMI (what a shocking phenomenon!), and I’m just really sorry that you’ve become collateral damage in HA’s quest to dominate (read: control and bully) the blogosphere.

          • avatar Temporary in*sanity

            No, no, no, no, no. @Party Pants, no apologies are necessary! Geesh, you maintain this site as a hobby, out of the goodness of your heart (and wallet), and if the occasional technical glitch strikes … so be it. Hey, maybe we’ll all get a little more actual work accomplished as a result!

            I hope you can get some rest very, very soon – both emotionally and physically. This debacle is almost certainly taking a huge toll on you, and it would suck beyond belief if you became ill because of the hit your body and brain have been taking. You sound as though you’re too close to hitting the wall today … please take care, okay?

        • avatar MrsG

          And there you go, right there is the difference between GOMI and many of the bloggers that get discussed here: No one gets banned from commenting. Yes, there are people who cross the lines in their comments. They are often called out for it.

          Interestingly enough, if you sift through the comments, particularly those about Heather, you will find a lot of people here who have expressed genuine concern and compassion for her well-being, They wish her no harm, they want her to be well, and her actions are clearly not those of a person who is at all well. But all of that gets overlooked and everyone who comments is lumped into one group and painted with a very broad brush.

          People are entitled to their opinions. Not everyone is going to like you, and not everyone buys into the “if you don’t have anything nice to say” school of thought. Hell, if we were all just supposed to be quiet and nice no matter what, investigative blogs would not exist. Plagiarizing bloggers would never be exposed. Bloggers perpetuating fraud would not be identified and outed. The people being scammed by the MLM asswipes wouldn’t have anyoone advocating for them.

          As much as you may have distaste for people who don’t like certain bloggers, GOMI and other sites just like it serve a purpose, and its not just to gossip or be mean.

          The world doesn’t have to live by your rules or mine.

    • avatar Sausage Snappers

      How does it hurt someone to suggest they have a YouTube show….?

  4. avatar Jasons Mom

    I wish everyone who reads GOMI and has a Dooce account would go leave a negative comment on her site. I don’t have an account and I refuse to get one. She is a schoolyard bully. If she doesn’t want us talking here maybe we should take it to her site.

    • avatar samcarter

      That just gives Dooce pageviews. Don’t do it. If you must read Dooce, do it in a feed or a reader. Although having to sanitize the comments would allow Tyrant to earn his rent.

    • avatar twisted pearls

      It would not be posted. The only reason this website exists is because we little people were frustrated that all the big blogs are now so carefully monitored that there is no negative feedback, arguments, questioning of their motives, etc etc etc.

      I used to LOVE to read a good discussion/argument in comments. I’ve stopped reading blogs that censor comments (other than obviously deranged posters who threaten, or reveal personal information). And I’ve heard a few bloggers complain that their page views are dropping. Hmmmmm…….

  5. avatar Whole Foods granola and conch shell and beetle husk

    So is her lawyer’s statement TECHNICALLY accurate? Like, was she maybe in Coachella or some suburb of Los Angeles that’s not technically Los Angeles, or was she not technically filming “a show,” or was it not for YouTube?

    • avatar oliver tweets

      I know… the wording is hinky.

    • avatar herpderpsnarf

      Yes yes, I agree so hard. Heather wasn’t in Los Angeles, she was in Indio for Coachella.

      Wearing jorts.

      She was definitely SOMEWHERE on her “sanity break”.

    • avatar Welcomeback

      Or not specifically on the 18th…

  6. avatar pemmy

    Give it a year and then Vanity Fair will have an article detailing the soaring heights and inevitable crash of Dooce’s empire. Just a matter of time. Until then…tick tock

    • avatar Whole Foods granola and conch shell and beetle husk

      More like the SL Trib, which ended its profile of her in 2009 with this:

      “”They also think I’m exploiting my family,” Armstrong said. To which her husband Jon, in the background of the phone call, cried “Help!”"

    • avatar Beverly Hills

      You got it. Build them up, watch them crash. It’s kinda sad, how low she has come. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this crap, PP.

  7. avatar KissMyGreasyGrits

    Totally tacky, but I wouldn’t expect otherwise from Dooce.

    BTW, what is up with your ad choices, PP? They’re cracking me up! I’m going to have to send you some of those Smiley Cookies with bacon frosting on them

  8. avatar self help

    Pretty sure Dooce is considered a public figure, and really doesn’t have a leg to stand on.

    • Word. I guess they didn’t teach New York Times v. Sullivan at whatever law school Dooce’s lawyer attended. Or, you know, damages?

      • avatar ohgoodlord

        How do you know it’s even a lawyer and not Tyrant! I wouldn’t trust it unless it had a number I could all and confirm it was an actual attorney’s office!

      • avatar mirele

        Not only that, Dooce didn’t exactly minimize damages–she instead posted it to her website and put it on her Twitter.

        Jeez Louise, Heather, you’re a real piece of work. Instead of sending a nice e-mail saying, “hey, you got it wrong” you took it all the way up to Defcon 6. Way to go, as someone said upthread, this will just be another incident in the fall of Dooce, formerly Queen of the Mommy Bloggers.

        • avatar idunno

          Seriously the only reason I remembered I had her on Twitter was seeing that the other day. Which was nice, because I could unfollow. I thought I’d done it already.

          What I read in that was – I have the funds and time to contact a lawyer because some website said something about me and won’t tell me who said it. Totally mature behavior for a reasonable adult.

          There is a reason I took her out of my feeder over a year ago.

    • avatar JFA

      She doesn’t. But it doesn’t stop a sheister (sp?) attorney from taking a retainer and writing a dumb fucking letter any first year associate can write. Not all attorneys have ethics. Plus he can only be as honest as his client is to him.

      • avatar mirele

        This. Lawyers are desperate for work these days. This is an easy, threatening letter to write, and the client has (relatively) deep pockets and has indicated she wants to sue. So, an easy $500 or $1000, with the possibility of a long libel suit that would continue to enrich the lawyer. Win-win all around!

    • avatar blackkat

      She said it herself, in her comments, she’s a “celebrity” with “fans.”

      • avatar clairetiffin

        When she referred to herself as a celebrity I felt sad for her. I thought she was a “writer”. Calling yourself a celebrity sounds so desperate.

        • avatar justsomelady

          I had no clue who the fuck she was until I found GOMI. She should thank you for my page views and get over herself.

          • avatar self help

            I had no idea who she was before GOMI either.

          • avatar RollsRoyceRevenge

            Nor I.

          • avatar shalter

            Nor I!

          • avatar anrylilpixie

            I picked up her book of the clearance section at BN last year. I had never heard of her until then. I must of missed something because it was awful and couldn’t get through the first couple of chapters. I couldn’t stand all the “poor me” attitude she had.

      • avatar The Rebel Chick

        That reminds of the SNL skit where the guy says he is Twitter Famous…”meaning?” … “not famous.”

  9. avatar weekend at bearnaise

    Thou doth protest too much eh Dooce?

  10. avatar Alice Roosevelt

    I wonder if this is a move to cover Dooce-ean ass as she ramps into Divorce Mode & plans to screw Jon out of money and/or time with the girls. If she’s hiding sources of revenue and/or travel done while still married, it might affect the outcome…?

    • avatar Random Person

      Good luck to Jon in those divorce negotiations.
      Ah well, I’m sure she will play fair.

      • avatar flying monkey

        yep (nods) She’s always fair and honest with everyone.

  11. avatar Dee

    Wow. I’ve been a big fan of Heather’s for years (buying her books, daily website visits, following on twitter). Her writing has really gone downhill in the past 2-years and, when the separation was announced, I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt as to her behavior. But I think this, after all the petty bullying shit she’s done through the years (Bloggess, sending her ‘fans’ to attack people on twitter, the maytag saga, poverty tourism, et al), was finally enough to make me go UNFOLLOW on twitter and unsubscribe via RSS. I like train-wrecks drama to a degree but she’s just over the top and I’m done. Get over yourself Heather. Sending a lawyer out due to hurt feelings instead of handling it like an adult? Real mature.

    Yet Another Former Fan of Dooce’s

    • avatar MrsG

      Yeah this is pretty much it for me. I’ve been a supporter for a long time, but this is beyond the pale.

    • avatar bunk

      Me too! Been reading her site since 2004 or so and have stopped. I also unfollowed her on twitter this week (truthfully I was in it for the train wreck and not the forced attempts at one-liners). I’m done with her.

  12. avatar GrumpyRD

    Who knew (tm CNC) that hypothesizing that Dooce was out of town working on something was so inflammatory and hurtful and malicious. Guys, please, please never imply that I am off working on something. That really hurts me. I’m truly committed to being an unemployed basement dweller and it would be really detrimental to my emotional and financial well being to accuse me of working.

    • avatar melondrama doesn't even have a blog


      Zomg don’t hurt me

    • avatar featherbrained

      THIS IS WHAT I DON”T GET! (sorry but I had to yell) What is malicious about the original “alleged” statement. Filming a youtube video???!!

      • avatar Mountie

        Exactly!! No one gave two shits where she was! She’s been lying to her “fans” for years. Remember when she was madly in love with her husband like five minutes ago? But this, this is what is making people see her true colors. She should sue herself for damages.

  13. avatar Coach Clodhoppers

    Such a piece of work. The woman has made a fool of her name and herself for the past 11 years on her blog and yet this is considered to be damaging to her reputation? Not writing bad things about her coworkers and boss? Not losing her goddamn mind over a washer? Not losing her goddamn mind over a news article or a blogger calling her a hobbit or someone saying on Twitter she was acting crazy? Not creating a persona that is literally synonymous with “doing something so fucking stupid you get yourself fired over it”? Not mining everything from her children’s childhoods to her husband’s vasectomy to her parents’ religion to her parents’ divorce to her shingles to the women of Bangladesh to her separation for page views, cheap laughs or sympathy? None of *that* is as detrimental to her reputation as one person saying she was in Los Angeles on a certain day?

    Dooce, you are just such a loser.

    • avatar Whole Foods granola and conch shell and beetle husk

      Yeah, maybe the definition of “dooced” should be expanded to include self-destruction on all levels: professional, romantic, familial, human…

      • avatar jehoshaphat

        Someone needs to make “Dooce” the new “Santorum”

    • avatar samcarter

      I can’t believe this is more damaging to her reputation than her discussing, in excruciating detail, her post-partum pooping or her husband’s vasectomy (and her delirious glee after both).

      • avatar chasing her dog

        Or domestic abuse (throwing milk at John)

      • avatar Pelt-a-polozza

        Or thoughts of hanging herself in her garage with a dog leash while her children slept. BUT THIS IS DEFAMATORY, YO.

    • avatar RollsRoyceRevenge

      Well, I have finally found something worse to go to than a comic book convention that is not Julia Allison’s birthday party.

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