WTF

Reese Witherspoon Knows Shakespeare

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Reese Witherspoon, actress, took a page out of Cup of Jo’s copy of Shakespeare’s Greatest Quotes by posting this bizarre attribution to her instagram.

Thanks to the internet I’m starting to think Shakespeare and Eleanor Roosevelt are the only two people in history who ever said anything.

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Vlogging

And Now Michelle Phan Has A Book Deal

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Michelle Phan, the vlogger who became a millionaire by showing people how to put on eye shadow, now has a book coming out in October.

Saying “It’s been a year in the making…I’ve poured my heart and soul into this book”, Phan announced the news in between squeals and head tilts via a youtube video.


She encouraged people to pre-order, saying advance purchasers would receive some kind of “limited edition” book jacket sketched by Phan herself. She then fanned her face during a faux teary “love you guys” and doing the glossy butthole looking kissy face ending she always does.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Jen Gotch Tries To Find The Lesson In A Urinating Woman

Jen Gotch, runs some kind of online store or something, was driving down Sunset in her car, which she does not live in, when she saw a moment worthy of instagram.

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Some followers were shocked, telling Jen to “offer compassion and empathy, not exploitation”, while others reacted with lols, saying “Are you sure that’s a lady? Haha”. Still others waved their banners of support, telling Jen they see the image as part of her “quest to find what it is to intentionally live your life with grace and gratitude”. Jen basically flipped dissenters the bird, telling them “your rush to judgment and public shaming of me is not welcome here” before posting a picture of a kitten because things “got extremely out of hand in that last post”.

Jen is clearly over the debate, saying it’s been “Such an interesting week. Thanks for all of the really really kind words and for the criticism, too. I don’t know most of you personally so I take both the good and bad with a grain of salt. I love salt.”

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Lifestyle Blogging Mommy Blogging

CecilyK Did Her Part To Help The “Brown Boys”, Then Flounced

After smearing her ragefeels all over twitter and facebook for two days, social slacktivist Cecily Kellogg made sure to remind everyone yesterday to go out and participate in the local protest rally.

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At the time of the rally, she flooded her instagram stream with pictures of her holding vigil candles, talking to the crowd, and holding her daughter’s hand while she explained why they were there. Oh wait, no she didn’t. She was too busy taking feminist Slurpee selfies at a green light.

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After fielding questions about why she wasn’t at the rally she had promoted so vocally and being called out for instagramming while driving, Cecily decided she’d had enough of the internet judging her inactivism. She’s now flounced off her instagram account.

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So much for taking responsibility for the “criticism loop”. Why actually change your behavior when you can just hide it so no one can judge you? That sounds like a totally healthy way for a recovered “drunk” to deal with things. Maybe she should have created a hashtag about it instead.

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Fashion Blogging

Pink Peonies Can Inflate Her Follower Count

Rachel Parcell, the owner of more white decor than Zeus, is being accused of buying followers for her instagram account.

On Wednesday her follower count shot up to 191,000; by yesterday it was up to 197,000. At the time of this post it had increased to 199,585 and is still steadily increasing.  A series of screenshots throughout last night shows the followers increasing rapidly. It seems they are showing up at a rate of about 30-40 an hour.

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Pink Peonies obviously isn’t the first or only blogger to purchase followers in order to seem more popular, and thus more appealing to major sponsors. It’s all part of the blogging land grab system, where numbers – real or fake – seem to matter more than content or engagement.

Since these follower buys always seem to happen right before a blogger gears up to pursue some kind of big publicity or sponsor I wouldn’t be surprised if we see ole Rachel in a television commercial or Vogue mention soon.

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