CecilyK / Uppercase Woman
September 5, 2013
7:40 pm
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Amazen Oats
Cat
Meows: 30
Snarking Since:
October 15, 2012

JMF said
fingerI have to stop reading this site.  I really do.  It makes me feel dirty.

Cecily has a blog, and she tweets constantly and she holds herself out as a "professional writer."  She is, therefore, fair game for a certain amount, and a certain type, of criticism, although I think what she is subjected to on this site is so unbelievably over the top that it makes me feel dirty reading it.   Criticize her grammar and her spelling.  Criticize the school she sends her kid to.  Criticize her oversharing and her dishonesty (when the dishonesty is provable, not when you just assume she is dishonest).  

But the unmerciful trashing of a little girl?  Step back and read what you are gleefully writing.  Is that really who you are?  Is that who you want to be?  Would you be proud to have your children read what you are writing?  Is that an example you would ever want to set?  I sometimes want to start a thread for the Cecily bashers to GOMI.

So Tori is bringing a stuffed animal to school the first day.  So the fuck what?  Maybe they got a letter home from the school asking the kids to bring in their favorite stuffed animal for show and tell the first day.  Maybe that stuffed animal is an incredibly important comfort object for her.  Maybe she and her friends made a pact to bring in their stuffed animals for a picnic lunch the first day.  Or maybe she asked if she could bring it, and Cecily said yes.  Heaven forfend, a seven-year old bring a stuffed animal to school.  Call the police!  You just don't know.  And the girl is 7, not 17.  Give her a break.  And maybe Tori loves that backpack, and wouldn't dream of having another one, even though her mother told her it was too dirty.  I know there are times when I give in to stupid shit like that from my kids even though I know the backpack is too dirty, or too small, or the pants are a little too short, or the top doesn't match the bottom so well.  Whatever. I guess someone should call child protective services on me, because surely my child will grow up dark and twisted because the strap of her pink backpack was a little dirty on the first day of school.  Or maybe it was all Cecily, and she just didn't notice or care that the strap was a little dirty.  Do you really have nothing better to do than write about it as if she committed an actual crime, or actually hurt her child? 

For all of the criticism of Cecily's parenting of Tori, Tori generally looks pretty happy, and certainly well-loved, to me.  Could all of you withstand the kind of scrutiny you subject Cecily to?  I know I couldn't.  I suspect many of you couldn't either.

I started reading this site with amusement.  I nodded my head a lot at the things that were said.  But somewhere along the way, I think this thread has lost its way.  The level of vitriol that is leveled at Cecily is astonishing in relation to her actual  importance in this world.  Pages of comments devoted to whether or not she should have gotten a fucking kitten????   People speculating that she paid $400 for said kitten, and then criticizing her for that?  Unbelievable.  Someone speculating one day about how many rolls of toilet paper she probably buys at a time, and then criticizing her for not buying more so that she can save money?  Really?  Really? 

The endless snarking on her daughter is just heartbreaking.  And anyone who says that it is all for Tori's own good is just full of shit. 

I am no Cecily white knight, believe me.  This isn't about Cecily.  It is about human decency.  And I'm sure I will get attacked for saying any of this, and you can have at me.  I won't care, because I won't be back, so enjoy. 

I will just say that I think I went to high school with some of you. 

I was one of the ones curious about the kitten and contributing to the "pages" of comments partly because I know nothing about cats, but mainly because it doesn't seem like she can afford it. I don't think it's "nitpicky" to ask how someone who has missed bankruptcy payments, has 2 pets already, and is financially helping out her mother is managing to add another mouth to feed. For me, it wasn't about how much the kitten's initial cost was, it was the monthly cost of that kitten that didn't make sense. 

Anyway. Some of your points I agree with (Tori is fine, not feral), but others I don't. That question about scrutiny is one of the ones I don't agree with. I know I don't, that's why I don't put myself online because that opens you up to criticism and scrutiny. 

September 5, 2013
8:04 pm
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instagremlin

I feel for Tori because the snark here is present in everyday life. As long as you are ready to participate at school, fed, supplies, hygiene taken care of to a standard that isn't off putting, that is sufficient.  She looks good to go. Anything more is signalling and it'd be a better world if we didn't send or receive them – but we do.  I have to have a talking to myself when we are off to do something messy and fun and I will snap a few photos and the kids outfits are a bit dorky.  If Cecily didn't seem so lackadaisical in other regards, I would admire the more relaxed attitude.  I think it is a lot better to be like Cecily than like Kelle.

I hope that because Cecily is going to take account of some of the detractors she really considers Tori's education. There are many pedagogies but it has been shown that hours at something really do make a difference to your mastery, I think this is one area traditional school has over child-led education. Plenty of compulsory writing and maths practise. 

September 5, 2013
8:19 pm
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mattiepie
Senior Cat
Meows: 293
Snarking Since:
February 1, 2012

Sorry, not sorry. Nobody is criticizing the kid, and we established that a million pages ago. The criticism is strictly about her parents, and their continued examples of bad parenting. Is it bad parenting to set no boundaries for your kid? You bet. Is it bad parenting to disregard your child's education? You bet. Is it bad parenting to feed your kid crap food, watch TV all day and night, and play video games rated R? Yep. Is it bad parenting to sit around and endanger the very roof over your child's head because it's oh so mundane to tie yourself down to a job? Yes. Is it bad parenting to present your child to the world as dirty, ill-clothed and ill-mannered? Yes. Yes, it is.

Tori is the innocent here. But don't expect that people are going to ignore some of the most egregious examples of Cecily's bad life choices, which unfortunately include Tori. I feel sorry for the kid, but her parents are the assholes here, and I don't think that it's out of line to discuss their assholery.

September 5, 2013
8:19 pm
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Si

For my younger son's first day of school, his older brother's bus was 20 minutes late. That threw a major wrench in our works. My point? Shit happens. And so we can snark all day long on KH for having everything perfectly staged, when, in real life, shit happens. Most of my kids' monumental moments are less than picture perfect. At least she cared enough to take a picture and share it proudly. Many parents don't, or are in prison, or are on the streets drunk or doing drugs, or or or……

September 5, 2013
9:04 pm
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Juju
LOLCat
Meows: 87
Snarking Since:
September 3, 2012

I went and found the picture of T to see what you Hams were on about because sometimes you can be REALLY nit picky, but, alas, I think a lot of what is being pointed out is true.  Of course, if you NEVER have to tote home workbooks or school books, I'm sure a bag of that size is perfectly fine.  The straps ARE dirty and that is NOT T's fault.  That's her mother's fault. That's five minutes of planning to toss the bag into a load of laundry at least one day prior to school starting.  Her leg is also VERY dirty.   I was hoping there were bruises, but it looks like something was spilled down her leg. That's not T's fault either.  That's, literally, 10 seconds with a wet paper towel. Shoot, I'd spit on my shirt and wipe off my little one's legs before sending her into school dirty. And that is not a humble brag.  That is gross.

I am not snarking on T.  I don't do that.  I was sad for the little girl in the picture that she was sent back to school with a dirty backpack and dirty legs.  I won't talk about her body or her hair.  I, too, had my share of unfortunate haircuts growing up and it looks like they're growing T's out. Her clothes are cute and while I don't get the Dr. Who and Merida reference (and I like both) whatever.  She's a little kid.

I'm starting to wonder if Cec has some sort of executive planning issues.  These are just basic, basic things that take little to no time to execute and, yet, they're not done.  Maybe going back to the Free School isn't a very big deal and therefore requires no special preparation? Maybe they had a back to school night and dropped off supplies (my kids do). I don't even want to spend time considering they required no supplies. 

If Tori is REALLY into math and science (and not just something her Mom is projecting on her to make her sound all geeky chic) Cec and the Hat need to start NOW trying to find her an educational option that will nurture her developing mind and interest.  She likes to code?  That's FANTASTIC.  I'm certain there are magnet/charter schools in the greater Philadelphia area who can cater to T's needs.

But beyond T, I really am starting to think that Cec's inability to complete basic tasks (budgeting, cooking, cleaning, basic child care) and implement any change in her life may be due to some greater issue that makes her unable to do those things. 

September 5, 2013
9:26 pm
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mrsholmes
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1110
Snarking Since:
July 18, 2013

Good lawd now she is yammering about the Yahoo logo. Has she ever taken a good look at her logos or title images for her posts. Again, another PAID piece that has zero research or her PERSONAL IN DEPTH insight into this earth shattering piece of news.

You would think the woman would have bigger fish to fry other than posting this drivel, I mean, the house is empty save for Charlie, she should be pumping out masterpieces. Not to mention she could maybe learn to cook something that isnt a gazillion calories and loaded with salt. She was the one who said she could finally breathe after her mother got the hell out of dodge. Maybe she should try research, editing and writing posts without the TV and see how that goes.

September 5, 2013
9:34 pm
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Floating Plates Of Cookies
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1178
Snarking Since:
August 16, 2012

Juju said

I went and found the picture of T to see what you Hams were on about because sometimes you can be REALLY nit picky, but, alas, I think a lot of what is being pointed out is true.  Of course, if you NEVER have to tote home workbooks or school books, I'm sure a bag of that size is perfectly fine.  The straps ARE dirty and that is NOT T's fault.  That's her mother's fault. That's five minutes of planning to toss the bag into a load of laundry at least one day prior to school starting.  Her leg is also VERY dirty.   I was hoping there were bruises, but it looks like something was spilled down her leg. That's not T's fault either.  That's, literally, 10 seconds with a wet paper towel. Shoot, I'd spit on my shirt and wipe off my little one's legs before sending her into school dirty. And that is not a humble brag.  That is gross.

I am not snarking on T.  I don't do that.  I was sad for the little girl in the picture that she was sent back to school with a dirty backpack and dirty legs.  I won't talk about her body or her hair.  I, too, had my share of unfortunate haircuts growing up and it looks like they're growing T's out. Her clothes are cute and while I don't get the Dr. Who and Merida reference (and I like both) whatever.  She's a little kid.

I'm starting to wonder if Cec has some sort of executive planning issues.  These are just basic, basic things that take little to no time to execute and, yet, they're not done.  Maybe going back to the Free School isn't a very big deal and therefore requires no special preparation? Maybe they had a back to school night and dropped off supplies (my kids do). I don't even want to spend time considering they required no supplies. 

If Tori is REALLY into math and science (and not just something her Mom is projecting on her to make her sound all geeky chic) Cec and the Hat need to start NOW trying to find her an educational option that will nurture her developing mind and interest.  She likes to code?  That's FANTASTIC.  I'm certain there are magnet/charter schools in the greater Philadelphia area who can cater to T's needs.

But beyond T, I really am starting to think that Cec's inability to complete basic tasks (budgeting, cooking, cleaning, basic child care) and implement any change in her life may be due to some greater issue that makes her unable to do those things. 

Pretty sure Tori's "interest" in math and science is entirely Cess faking what she thinks is hip and trendy onto the kid. Everything Cess has posted in the past indicates that Tori is just an average, normal kid who likes stuffed animals (the one that went to school with her today, the horse that Cess dispatched the Internet to find for her for Christmas, the lamb that Cess screamed at her for romping around with when she felt T should be wallowing in the Boston Marathon Bombing footage with her) drawing, and playing video games. PLAYING them, not coding them. Lets hope Tori really DOESN'T have an interest in STEM, since she'd be pretty disappointed to find out that she has zero chance of ever making such a career a reality in the future.

*~* Also Known As Beezus Christ *~*
September 5, 2013
9:56 pm
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Juju
LOLCat
Meows: 87
Snarking Since:
September 3, 2012

Beezus Christ said

Pretty sure Tori's "interest" in math and science is entirely Cess faking what she thinks is hip and trendy onto the kid. Everything Cess has posted in the past indicates that Tori is just an average, normal kid who likes stuffed animals (the one that went to school with her today, the horse that Cess dispatched the Internet to find for her for Christmas, the lamb that Cess screamed at her for romping around with when she felt T should be wallowing in the Boston Marathon Bombing footage with her) drawing, and playing video games. PLAYING them, not coding them. Lets hope Tori really DOESN'T have an interest in STEM, since she'd be pretty disappointed to find out that she has zero chance of ever making such a career a reality in the future.

 

No, I agree with you.  I just like leaving the benefit of a little doubt.  Maybe Tori IS great at math and really interested in game coding.  It could happen.  If it is true, than Tori needs intervention and a great education.  My kids are average (they're wonderful, but they're average and that's okay) but if they showed aptitude for math and science like that, we'd be pulling strings and changing schools to get them the very best we could to encourage that.  Minds that are that well suited to STEM at such a young age should really be encouraged.  If Tori has any passing interest, she's not going to cultivate it at the Free School where probably no one has a higher level degree in anything like that.  Do they have degrees?  That Free School seems shady as fuck and I do not get why anyone would ever send their kids there.  They don't even have video of their own school.  They're showing a Sudbury school.

 

Gah!

 

Sorry.  That Free School thing makes me stabby.

September 5, 2013
10:45 pm
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The fattest fat who ever fatted
Senior Cat
Meows: 208
Snarking Since:
January 31, 2012

How is it you hams can tell something was spilled on Tori's leg.  I actually pulled the picture down onto my desktop and looked at it very closely.  Those look like bruises on her little shins.  How are y'all able to know that is dirty or something that spilled?  I seriously cannot see it.

September 5, 2013
11:00 pm
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Floating Plates Of Cookies
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1178
Snarking Since:
August 16, 2012

Oh I know we are on the same page, Juju. I admire your optimism. I too cringe at that ridiculous "school"…all it is is a day care! And a shabby, unstructured one at that.

*~* Also Known As Beezus Christ *~*
September 5, 2013
11:18 pm
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Royal tennenbaum
Cat
Meows: 25
Snarking Since:
October 1, 2012

What I think is so appalling….the woman is a "professional" blogger who documented her fertility issues for the world to see. Clearly she very much wanted this child and loves her dearly. So why can't she take pride in her miracle child? For the first day of school pride in sending her neat and clean! Not snarling…just sad for this little girl. Get her some clothes that fit nicely for the first day of school. Lose the gross sandals. Take the backpack out of way before you snap the picture to put online. Poor child.

September 6, 2013
12:33 am
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thlack-jawed tooth ferry
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 551
Snarking Since:
March 8, 2012

According to the Hat's twitter it seems they will be moving to the city "soon".

September 6, 2013
1:36 am
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Respect privacy and lies OH MY
CH
Hamprince of Meowtonia
Meows: 7774
Snarking Since:
April 11, 2012

slack-jawed said
According to the Hat's twitter it seems they will be moving to the city "soon".

So without mommy's money each month, they are going to lose the house?

Bloggers SAY they want respect and privacy BUT all they do is lie.

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