Jessica Schroeder Quirk, married full time blogger, blogs her fashiony outfits as her full time job. Unfortunately she is just too cold and busy with her happy, fulfilling life to work at her full time job anymore:
There’s something so seventies about pairing a long camel coat with a floppy brimmed hat like this – then add those ultra flared jeans and I’m seriously thinking I fell into Diane Keaton’s closet (yes? please?). Underneath I’m just rocking a plain sweatshirt and calling it a DAY. It is so cold here! I remember when I lived in New York and walked 10 minutes to the train that I thought 17 degrees was just. the. worst. Well, it’s not. Four degrees is the worst.
Getting dressed and “calling it a DAY” is your everyday already. How is this different? Anyway, one commenter decided to be jealous and not tell Messica she love love loved her outfit.
1)I am not a fan of this look. I’m sorry, usually I like your style but I am not feeling this one.
2)It isn’t really even an outfit. It is a hat, a scarf, and a trench.
Messica, size medium, responded in her typical breezy dismissive fashion:
1) Ok! That’s not a problem
2) Is too an outfit ;) you just can’t see my awesome sweatshirt.
And then, also typical, quickly tweeted a self-hug:
shitmydadsays “Don’t focus on the one guy who hates you. You don’t go to the park and set your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit.”12:41 PM Jun 28th via ShitMyDadSays.com Retweeted by whatiwore and 100+ others
Meanwhile scientists are working around the clock to reverse her trip through the teleporter with a chipmunk.
Wait, SWEATSHIRT? You just wanted to wear a plain sweater instead?! YOU DUN GOOFED!
She doesn’t even look like herself anymore. Drowning in Sloppy Drab Shit.com
D’oh, I dun goofed, I read that as she’s would have rather had a plain sweater on instead.
Still, sweatshirt is fucking NOT what you should be wearing under all that.
I know. And she even says she’s calling it a day after putting on A SWEATSHIRT. Jeans and a sweatshirt on a fashun blawg. Seriously, any of us h8t0rz could do this better.
it would have been just as easy for her to put on a crisp white button down, layered with a black or navy turtleneck underneath. totally would have made real the whole annie hall vibe to which this outfit aspires (and fails).
but no, despite being an omg full-time fashun blogger, she couldn’t figure that out and just decided to throw on a sweatshirt.
Supposedly she has all these clothes but where the fuck are they? Still unpacking?! Fuck me sideways I unpacked and organized an entire HOUSE full of stuff in less than a week ALONE and I worked. Bitch crazy if she thinks we’re gonna buy the “I’m still opening boxes” nonsense.
Why is she bitching about the weather anyway? She only lived out side of Indiana for a few years, I give up. She NEEDS to fail, then she can get some therapy and return to real life. Just pray you don’t turn into an obese shelter lady! Have a nice day! I’m married! Catssss!!
1. She looks like a COMPLETELY different person here. Honestly, if you’d put up the green dress pic from last year, and then this one, and said they were two different people, I would buy it.
2. Does this girl not get dressed in a nice, warm house? Is she forcing herself to run outside naked, then get dressed? Then why on earth is there any ‘calling it a day’? Messica, this really isn’t hard.
Go to closet and put together something good, while inside, in the heated free house.
Run outside, pose, take pictures
Go back inside and carry on with life, or add more layers AFTER you take care of the ‘full time job’ duties that should take, what, ten minutes?
In addition, shouldn’t a ‘fashion blogger’ be trying to figure out stylish ways to dress warmly, considering she now LIVES IN A COLDER CLIMATE? You would think this would be a #1 obvious priority – Ok, I’ve moved myself and my business somewhere new, let’s adapt!
why doesn’t she take pics inside like she used to? It’s not like the scenery behind her in any of these pics is interesting.
Right? That’s what I’ve been wondering – if it’s so gd cold, then put together your outfit inside, take your pics inside, and then stay inside and do “work” in your outfit. Not hard!
I’ve been thinking about this, also. It’s like she’s borrowing a family house that’s in a top secret location, with top secret materials, so secret the walls can’t be photographed.
If she was photographed inside, she would not have the excuse to throw on the coat over the extra layers of love (fat) that she has acquired since moving to Bloomington.
PS: I love that my Spell check program does not recognize Bloomington as a word.
It’s not even that much colder. She’s acting like she just moved to Indiana (where she used to live!) from Florida. She moved from New York. On any given day, the temperature in NY might be 10 degrees warmer than Indiana. They’re not that different.
ALSO, SHE GREW UP IN INDIANA.
Right?
So, she should be changing it up with some chic coats.
Teaching us how to layer in an oh-so-fashion way, looking at the styles of Norway, Sweden, Iceland and showing how those women look chic and put together in the coldest weather – obviously it can be done!
You know, maybe doing some research on how to create these fabulous Scandinavian cold-weather styles for less, at stores we have access to! What an awesome feature that would be!
But no, she’s throwing on a sweatshirt and calling it a day.
How about something like “after our honeymoon in Iceland (and a move back to colder Indiana!) I got inspired to see how they keep warm in that beautiful, but cold country! this week I’ll be showing my remixes of the stylishly warm Icelandic fashions I saw”
There, Messica. Just did your next month’s work for you.
Seriously.
How hard would that be? She took pictures while she was there, even!
You’re implying she did things like took “notes” or photos and paid attention to people other than the beloved Quirk… She doesn’t put that much thought or effort into ANYTHING.
OMG that last outfit is fabulous. I want to rock it and feel like Stevie Nicks 24/7.
those house must be fug inside. IIRC, they’re living in the house of a dead relative that hasn’t been sold yet. so ya, it probably is fug inside, with shag carpeting and tacky wallpaper.
no worse than her outfits, though.
She is just so full of shit. She doesn’t dress down because it’s cold–she doesn’t go anywhere, and when she does she has access to a car. She dresses down because she has no reason not to, especially when she doesn’t go to the studio (where I don’t doubt she and her OMGfashion are mostly ignored anyway). She has no networking events in Bloomington, no need to dress well for dates or a girls’ night out (did you hear she’s MARRIED and has no friends?), no big days at work where she might want a little extra style to give her added confidence. I would be so depressed if I were here. Hell, I was in a similar situation for six months (self-employed) and I WAS depressed.
And now I have a real job that I am thankful for every single day, because even though I walk two miles to get to it each way in the motherfucking New England winter, and currently have an injury that requires me to use crutches, I at least have a reason to look nice, a reason to feel good about myself. I have something meaningful to do! She should try it.
Two miles? In NE weather? Hat off, dude. (I lie. I’m not taking my hat off. It is 42 and raining in California, and I am sitting on my back porch in boots, corduroys, a hoodie, a jacket, two pairs of gloves, a blanket and a fleece aviator hat. I love winter, but I bundle like a mofo for admittedly mild temperatures.)
Sigh. I miss Orange County winters.
It was like 80 degrees in San Diego recently :( I miss SoCal winters as well.
Put on jeans and a sweatshirt.
Start a fashion blog.
I die at this. Every time.
I like how she looks like she’s waiting for a high five.
hahahahahha
i donno, i don’t think the outfit is that bad. if jessica had a personality and a career, no problem! that’s cool! it’s not the focal point, it doesn’t have to be mindblowingly cool and original… I don’t like when people overdress just because they have a fashion blog. They don’t need to dress like they’re royalty or anything. I wouldn’t add glitter to the outfit or anything. I would add a REAL CAREER.
Missing ingredient right there.
http://www.jobomelette.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Dwight_Schrute.jpg
(How do you upload images?)
http://img223.imageshack.us/img223/8568/advicedogtz7.png
what appears when i googled “helpful advice”
whoa that girl is talllllllllllll
she’d better never go to Canada then. 4 degrees is summer.
That’s not true!!
Sent from my igloo
I like polar bears
She’s only 5’8″. And a size medium!!! Have a nice day!
I think you are wrong! She’s 5’9″! Thanks!
That’s what I meant! This isn’t a grammar blog!
Adjust your monitor!
ROFLMAO!!! i die.
It’s -5 (C) here today. Not that bad.
We have a summer, enough with the stereotypes.
Maybe Messica is cold because she’s still wearing peep toe shoes. Put on some boots. Getting dressed isn’t that hard
I understand being cold sucks. I do! I am working right now wearing my winter wool coat, inside, because it is 40 degrees here in Florida and I am no longer used to that.
But!
I worked with a photographer, in New Brunswick, Canada, NAKED, in November, for several hours, outside, in nature. It was cold, it was uncomfortable, but I loved his work and was getting prints and managed. I didn’t die. I hung in there, there were blankets in between poses, it was great.
Can she really not pose for five minutes outside in a properly styled outfit? Figure out a winter strategy, have a friend with a heated car idle nearby so she can duck in and thaw out between jumping with her mouth open and twirling? Bring a thermos of warm tea? Plan a little?
I mean, if you want to be all FASHION, maybe you should take some tips from the industry and do some planning.
Just saying.
lol – lived in quebec for a year and it was BUTT FUCKING COLD!!!!
But now that I’m spoiled by California, 55F is tots freezing to me!
Paging Carmen Sandiego…
Like, I get what she’s trying to do with this outfit – the whole 1970′s androgynous artiste deal – but that coat is so ill-fitting and that scarf looks so stupid…yet again, so close yet so far.
Damn…. you got me by 5 hours. Inexcusable. :(
Wait, so she’s 27 and her dream is to raid a 64 year-old’s closet? I mean Diane Keaton fucking rocks, but that probably shouldn’t be her immediate fashion goal.
lollllllllllll
Please pardon Stupid Bitch, her only cultural references are Diane Keaton in “Annie Hall,” and Audrey Hepburn in “Breakfast At Tiffany’s.” Even though she proclaims to like “movies from the 60s” you can’t expect the girl to be a cineaste. Come now. She’s married and writing a book, she’s too busy.
Comment:
Jeans are not warm AT ALL. You need some silk long underwear.
Reply:
In all my years I have yet to hear about that! Sounds divine! Gotta get myself a pair! Or… Santa???
Really? She’s never heard of that? Even with all the Quirk family camping? In all MY years, I’ve never read such crap, written so badly.
Or just…underarmor. $14/pop. Made for skiing. Doesn’t even have to be silk.
I LIVE IN FLORIDA. I OWN TWO PAIRS.
Even tights under jeans make a difference.
She’s being snarky in that response.
You’re giving her too much credit.
How super down to earth! And interactive! I can see why her fans like her!
Why is she not the #1 fashion blogger of Earth yet?!
oh my god is she serious. How has she not figured out that if you wear tights or leggings under jeans, you’ll be warmer?
The proportions are all wrong. She looks like two kids, one sitting on the others shoulders, and then walking on stilts. The jacket is too long and engulfs her, and with the too long, wide-legged pants, she just doesn’t look natural. Two kids playing dress up in a giant’s clothes.
This. I was wondering why her legs are about 4 times the size of her upper body. FAIL.
She. Has. Given. Up. In the words of Seinfeld: “When you start wearing sweat suits, you’re telling the world you have given up.”
win
so…i posted that on her site (sorry for stealing it!) and she actually responded!
me: “In the words of Seinfeld: “When you start wearing sweat suits, you’re telling the world you have given up.”
messica: “Its a good thing I didn’t rock the matching bottoms then!”
and she misses the point once again. very surprised she actually accepted this, though.
You rock fail, messica. That is all.
*clears off desk*
Yeeeah Jessica you don’t “rock” a plain sweatshirt. In fact you don’t rock anything anymore. And please stop using the rockin’ phrase. Have a great day.
This is what enrages me. JESSICA YOU ARE A FASHION BLOGGER. If someone can’t see your outfit, YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. Is she never wrong in her eyes? EVER? The over-defensiveness is fucking grating.
Well, she’s married, so obviously she is doing SOMETHING right. And her MIL ROCKS. She won.
Her mother in law is just happy that her little Quirk is married. She was probably worried for a while that he wouldn’t find anyone. I mean, look at him.
LOL. Seriously. He’s unfortunate looking. With a personaltiy to match.
Made for each other.
in other news, the glamourai looks adorable today.
Did you see her house tour on Apartment Therapy?
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/kelly-gregs-chez-glamouramous-house-tour-134112
I don’t know what I would do if I was surrounded by that much fabulosity 24/7. Die happy, probably.
i love that apartment
omg i just found my dream apartment. stealing EVERY style concept about it.. LOVE
Your monitor’s wrong, thanks!
Does she have feet? Pretty certain outfits contain shoes. I’m all sorts of confused by the suck.
The garbage can in the background is also very chic.
WIN.
PP – The snark in this post title is just TOO. MUCH. I can’t handle it. Well done.
the post title is cracking me up too!